what i've learned this past year.

i've learned a lot about myself and what i'm capable of this past year.


i've learned that if i set my mind to accomplish something, i can, and will, do it.  i've learned that happiness is 98% based upon your attitude.  i've learned that if you really want something, you have to make it happen. i've learned that random compliments can make you feel even more beautiful.  i've learned that while it takes a few minutes to make a friend, it takes a long time to establish a friendship.  i've learned that sometimes the most unexpected things happen at the most unexpected times in the most unexpected places.  i've learned to roll with the punches that life throws at you.  i've learned that everyone has something, even if they seem so perfect.  i've learned that friends can sometimes make the worst situations all better.  i've learned that if you mess up, it takes a lot more than a sincere apology to make it all better.  i've learned that words without actions are just words - if you're going to talk the talk, you better walk the walk.  i've learned that sometimes the outcome of a situation is far beyond your control. i've learned that growing up is a really scary thing and i'm not sure i'm ready for it.  i've (finally) learned that if someone wants to be apart of your life, they'll make an effort.  i've learned that you can't force people into liking you, and that guilt tripping people is definitely not the key to a successful friendship.  i've learned that you can't treat people like dirt and expect them to still want to be your friend.  i've learned that it has to get worse before it gets better.  i've learned that true friends will always have your back.  i've learned that you can't wait for everything to be perfect, because there is no such thing as perfect.  i've learned that sometimes it's okay to be selfish.  i've learned that while i have more quirks than most people, i'm okay with that - and i've finally learned to love me for me.  

oh, and i've learned that life is much more enjoyable looking like this 

instead of this

xoxo skinny girl

look good, feel good.

people who look good feel good.  generally this is true.  i was talking to my sister, julia, the other day and i asked if i looked good.  she said "i don't know, do you?  obviously if you felt the urge to ask me, you must not be feeling as confident as you should be."  i've been thinking a lot about this lately and i think i'm adopting it as my motto.  if i feel like i have to ask someone if i look decent without them telling me, that must mean i don't feel like i'm presenting myself the best way i can.


so from here on out, whenever you see me, i WILL be well groomed and feeling like a million bucks.  heads will turn.  hearts will break. because let's get real - i am beautiful.  and i finally have the self confidence to believe it.

my biggest booster.  my best friend.  my annie girl.

my vacation to the grand cayman islands.

shabbat shalom and welcome home!  i'm back from the vacation of a lifetime with a great tan and more great summer reads under my belt.  can i just be the first to say that going on a vacation to a tropical place as a[n almost] skinny person is phenomenal?


reasons why :


[1] i can actually wear a cute bathing suit.  
[2] i actually own a cute bathing suit that isn't a size XL
[3] i can eat whatever i want [sans gluten/wheat/dairy] without everyone in my family looking at my like i should be on a diet.
[4] i have confidence!!! I ACTUALLY HAVE CONFIDENCE!  in a bathing suit, that is.
[5] i can wear a tank top dress without feeling self conscious.
[6] i don't exceed the weight limit to go parasailing.
[7] airplane seats are a lot more comfy, as is the plane ride.
[8] my tan self looks a lot better without a disgusting white stomach.
[9] the guy helping me off the boat didn't have that hard of a time. 
[10] did i mention i have [much more] confidence?


oh, and being a GF/DF traveler STINKS!  since someone thought it would be a great idea to put gluten in turkey, i was stuck eating popchips and starbursts on the plane ride.  now most of you are thinking "hey, don't complain.  eating chips and sugar isn't that bad!"  yes, it is.  when you're traveling and are tired, sugar just makes your headache THAT much worse.  but i got sushi with kimmah after i got home, so that made it all the more worthwhile.  and now i'm just rambling...


vacation was great.  i swam with stingrays, walked on a sand bar in the middle of the ocean, and parasailed.  [yes, i was light enough to do that!]  i loved reading every single day and swimming in the clear ocean water.  would ya'll like to see some pictures of my epic vacation?  well, since you asked so politely, here ya go.

 ollie the sand pig.  hi ollie!

 sting ray massage.  and i really like this picture.  confidence, not cockiness.

 mah family in the middle of the ocean with a stingray.  what has your family done lately?

mah sisters.  julia was kind of freaking out the whole time.

i had a recent conversation with my dad about my weight and life in general.  he said "you know, ali, i can't remember you before.  this is how you've always looked to me."  it makes me really grateful that i kind of have a chance to revamp/create a new image for myself.  i hope when people think of me, they think of the new and improved ali -- the ollie who has all the confidence in the world.  because now i do.  

xx ALi