Tuesday, October 14, 2014

#becauseofhim


she's back. rawr.

alright guys-- i'm back.  back in action.  yay!

i've been contemplating for the past 2ish months on what this post should be about.  considering i've been out of commission for 18 months, it's kind of a big deal.  sort of like me.

recaps/updates:
[1] still at byu-i
[2] still awesome
[3] still studying accounting
[4] still awkward
[5] still hilarious

oh, and i don't swear.  that's a big one.

i had a really tender experience today.  it all started last week when i realized i had to study for my acctg333 class-- advanced spreadsheet application.  it has a reputation for being pretty torturous.  i can confirm that the reputation is true.  we had our first test this week and i was freaking out.  i'd done well on my homework and on monday i was continuing my study-capades.  i put an hour on hold to go to FHE (family home evening) even though i was super stressed and didn't know if i had time to goof off with some peeps for that long.  so worth it.  i ended up staying up pretty late on monday night finishing the study-capade.  tuesday morning rolls around and i wake up early with the intention of studying some more before class.  didn't happen.  i relaxed and read my scriptures.  and i ended up being in the bathroom for 30 minutes due to stress/my morning sickness (don't worry-- i'm not pregnant.  i just get super sick in the morning.)  i was freaking out because i had woken up 3 hours before the class and hadn't gotten any study time in!  but while in the bano i had this weird feeling come over me: "you're going to be fine.  you've got this."

fast forward to the quiz.  i did awful.  horrible.  probably the worst i've ever done on a quiz in my entire life.  slightly freaking out, i re-worked every single homework problem.  i set up camp in the lib and went to town, tackling 1-period, 2-period, and 3-period problems.

today was the day of the test.  i woke up early to take my roommate to school.  i drove a friend/mission companion to the store.  i may or may not have woken a friend up and had him drive my roommate and i to class.  but i felt calm.  i went to the testing center and started my test.  and two hours later the test was complete.  and i got an 89%

i am convinced that everything in our lives happens the exact way it's supposed to happen.  if i would have gotten a good grade on my quiz then i wouldn't have studied for the test.  and in all honesty, i probably would have failed it.  but since i bombed my quiz i was forced to study extra hard for my test.  and as a result i did amazingly well.

guys-  God is good.  i cannot even begin to explain the feeling i have right now.  i KNOW that God is looking out for us; even in the little things-- especially in the little things.  does God really care about how well i do on my 333 test?  yes.  he cares about each and every one of us and that is what i've spent the last 18 months doing.  i've been sharing this message of God's hope and love and awareness and desire to help us become the people we need to be!  it's quite extraordinary.

whenever you're feeling lost and confused or something doesn't work out the way you had hoped/planned/dreamed, just think, "what does God need me to do as a result of this?"  it will work out.  i pinky promise you that God is 105% aware of you and loves you so much.  so so so much.

God's timing > our timing.

okay.  i'm out.

and i'm back,

rawr.